A thought from a conversation I had with a great friend about two years ago. I decided then and there that I would make a concerted effort to notice those times, to appreciate them. To recognize that things will never be 'perfect' but to choose to ignore the frustrations and enjoy the overwhelming good.
18 months ago I had such a moment; I was driving in the evening in Miami, don't ask where, I don't remember. What I do remember: driving with the windows down in my new car, a car provided to me by God when my previous car had finally crapped out on me. I had a car I could afford and could trust (At the time!) to get me from point a to b, in a new city, with a full time job, enjoying the beautiful weather and this song came on the radio:
In that moment I knew things were going well; for once I could recognize that for that moment in time, life was ok. That song then took on new meaning for me as I counted my blessings. Every time I hear it now, I remember how I felt in that moment. And in subsequent weeks when the 'good' was gone, when the cycle restarted and I was almost crushed by stress, I had the pleasure of knowing I appreciate the 'good'.
That song came on the radio again today, and for the moment, I choose to enjoy the peace.
It's been three weeks from hell.
It's been three weeks that have taught me much and have caused me to grow in ways I had not fathomed.
And things are not perfect right now. Things are still up in the air. Things have not resolved. But for the moment, I am at peace.
Ironically, as I mentioned before, we were without internet for 2 1/2 weeks. It was an interesting predicament to feel like I had a story to share, and no way to share it. Now that we are back up and running I am beginning to process through the events, but I am almost overwhelmed by the wealth of prose rattling around in my head. Overwhelmed that I won't do the story, or God, justice. Overwhelmed that I will botch it up. However, I do plan on sharing just as soon as I have the motivation and courage to write the posts. Likely it will be in pieces, as much as I can write in one sitting. As much as I can process,. So bear with me. There are a slew of posts coming in the next week or so, posts describing these events, because I want to remember them, years from now. Posts analyzing my reactions. Posts reflecting.
The crises are winding down, and I am beginning to hope that all of the stories will have happy endings, but many are still unwritten.
It's time to tell the story of April. Lilly's story, but also the story of me.